Real Questions from Real Pain

Sometimes I get asked questions that are really hard to answer. The other day I was in Jovil, going to bible study with Ate Flor. We met with three women, and studied the passage of Jesus calming the storm. After asking if they ever felt like Jesus was asleep in their "boat" during a difficult time in their life, the difficult questions came. Are the wealthy closer to God than the poor? Is that why they are blessed with more? Why are there rich and poor people? Why when I pray does my situation stay the same? Is Jesus even in my boat?

What's hardest for me is knowing that I represent the "wealthy" in that room. As I try to answer, I know that I will be going home to a spacious apartment with a full fridge, a toilet that flushes, running water, electricity, and access to anything I need. And yet I try to share that Jesus came for the poor. That the poor are the ones who know they are desperate for a savior. The truth is sin such as greed has caused the inequalities that I see in the world. And Jesus does hear their cry and has blessed them. He has given them a roof over their head, food for most meals, a newborn baby boy that brings joy to their family. So I encouraged them to look for the gifts God has given. But the world is not as it should be. Jesus' kingdom needs to come to Jovil, so that the suffering will end and hope can enter the hearts of those who are struggling. That is my prayer. Please pray with me that his kingdom will come soon.

Just one can make a difference

Yesterday, Pastor Julius invited Jason, Nathan and I to go to the Payatas garbage dumpsite to be part of the feeding program that was going on. Although I have become accustomed to seeing makeshift homes made of random materials pieced together to create not just shelter, but a home for families to live, it still isn’t easy to see. And this time, the huge mountain of garbage loomed behind the homes, a place where mother, father, and child go to dig through trash trying to find something to sell or recycle to earn enough money to buy food. The smell was overpowering, and the flies were everywhere. It’s worse, they said, during the rainy season. But I think the thing that I was struck by this day, as we helped serve food and took pictures of smiling kids was the story behind the Matthew Project, as the feeding program is called. For eight years now, one woman we met and others who have come along at different times, kids have been fed one good meal five days a week. It started with 50 kids, now there are over 1200 kids in several different locations. It all started because one man and his family had a vision to start this program and use the money from their business to fund it. I think that is what was most encouraging to me. That one person using the resources God gave him to help those in need could make such a difference. Isn’t that always the question—what can one person do when the need is so great? Well, enough to help a thousand kids get food in their stomachs. Instead of seeing the problem as too great to do anything, I want to use whatever resources God has given me to make as big or as small a difference as I am able.

Ducks and Motorcycles

I am usually a pretty uptight person when it comes to certain “safety” procedures (just ask Jason, he loves to make fun of me for it). I’m a stickler for seat belts; booster seats till age 8 or 80 pounds; not riding a motorcycle, but if you must, at least with a helmet; and not touching members of the fowl family since they are certain to carry all sorts of nasty diseases. So it’s like in the movie “Along came Polly”, where the obsessive compulsive always-neat guy meets the messy carefree girl, only it’s Along came the Philippines! Now, we pile in a van and throw the kids in the extra spots on the floor or piled on someone’s lap. Nathan rides on a motorcycle that belongs to one of the pastors on our team…without a helmet. And tonight, Nathan came home with a little yellow baby duckling. It was a gift from a couple at our slum site. It was probably a future meal and they insisted that he have it as a gift. So I overlook yet another broken safety net, and work on trusting God more. Trusting that He will protect us when we are driving, even though if you look out the window, you are tempted to think, we are going to die!! Trusting that He will look after Nathan when he isn’t wearing a helmet. Trusting that He will protect Nathan from getting sick from a bird. Most of all, trusting that God never stops caring for us or watching over us like little children. I am learning to put my trust in the unfailing God who created all things, including us and the birds. In the end, He probably does a better job protecting Nathan than I ever could.

About two weeks ago, Jason and I attended a baby dedication for two babies on our team. We were asked to be godparents to both of them, an honor and a privilege we shared with several others. John Kristoff Ezekiel is the six month old son of Pastor Johnrey and Ate Emily. Pastor Johnrey works with the youth at our church site and leads worship. They also have two girls, the oldest a 5 year old with cerebral palsy. Princess Anelise is the three month old daughter of Kuya Hermie and Ate MaryChris. They are volunteer leaders at our church site in Montalban. It was a wonderful occasion, full of joy and love. And yet I was given a glimpse of the pain of poverty. Ate Emily shared honest struggles she sometimes has knowing that her daughter can not get the therapies she needs that might help improve her quality of life. She shared the temptation she has sometimes to find a job overseas that would pay enough for her to not only afford those therapies, but also to send money to help the rest of her family in the province. Her family in the province only has enough food for one person to eat each day. In moments like those, I feel helpless, wanting so much to have a solution. About a week later, another pastor’s wife, Ate Josie, shared that her salary from the private school where she teaches long hours was withheld due to lack of funds. And this just before Christmas. Somehow, though, the struggles are given to God, and they place their trust in Him. If only I was that quick to depend on God in times of difficulty. And in the midst of these difficulties, there is found reason to rejoice. On this day, it was for two new lives that joined the families, and we were given the honor to share in that joy.

Pastor Johnrey, Ate Emily, John Kristoff, and Nissi with us

Treating us like Family

After visiting all of the slum sites with the MMP pastors, it was decided that Jason and I would be assigned to the group at Montalban. We were secretly hoping we would get to go there, since we really connected with the leaders and the area. Jason is going more often than I am, because of homeschooling, but we have had a few opportunities to spend time with the team. The group is like one big family--many of them live together in a compound in a nearby town, and others close by. Since the first day we met them, they have welcomed us in and treated us like family. Pastor Julius and his wife Ate Evelyn have one daughter and another on the way. Their 10 year old daughter is the girl to the right of Nathan. Pastor Lando and his wife Ate Josie have an 8 year old daughter, pictured to the left of Nathan. When we spent the day with them last Saturday, the girls would not leave Nathan's side, and even cried when we left despite the fact that we were going to see them the next day at church.
Another family that goes to the village each week as part of an outreach team from Pastor Julius' church in Payatas (the town that is close to Montalban) has three children, the youngest of which is two months old. Her name is Princess Anelise and her parents, Ate Mary Chris and Kuya Hermie, have asked us to be her godparents. This is a big honor and is a way for Filipinos to include you in their family. We already feel like part of the family! This is a picture of Ate Flor with Nathan in front of what is called the Banana Republic. Ate Flor fell in love with Nathan the first day she met him and was so excited to hear that we would be on their team. She is the only woman on the actual leadership team that raises support to be in the area, so she was also excited to have another woman on the team. Ate Flor is awesome. The first day we met her she told us that though her support is not always enough to provide food every meal, she just trusts in God and He provides what she needs. Her joy is contagious, and she never meets us with empty hands. She always brings us a gift, usually a Philippino fruit that we have not tried yet. I think the order of her excitement level with seeing us usually starts with Nathan, then me, and last Jason.
Montalban has two areas, Jovil (which sounds like Joubel) and Banana Republic. Jovil is a government housing project where many families were placed to "clean up the city." The area around it is beautiful and mountainous, but the village is isolated and work is hard to find. Many of the men travel to Payatas where the garbage from the city is brought and try to find work as scavengers. Because travel costs money, they will often stay in Payatas for the week and come home once a week. This is hard for the family stucture. There is some electricity, but in July a Canadian team built a water pump from the creek to the church, and they are still waiting for electricity to power it to be able to have drinking water. The city provides free water every other day for 15 minutes, and it is not good for drinking. Buying drinking water is expensive. The MMP pastors have provided some livelihood training. They have taught mothers in the village to make woven doormat rugs, which are then sold. This has helped them build relationships with these families and has made it easier to come into their homes and talk to them about the love of Jesus. The other area has its name because of the presence of so many banana trees. These homes are made of tarp and boxes, some with tin roofs. It is humbling to see how some people live, and yet they are full of joy and are welcoming to us.
Anyway, just wanted to show where we were going and some of the people we are meeting.

A Story in the Lamb's Book of Life

Well, I'm finding it's hard to keep up with this blogspot. For one thing, it seems like stuff happens too fast and I can't even keep focused on all the things I am seeing before something else happens. Also, it seems my days just fly by with little time for sitting and thinking and writing and things like that. But the stories I hear and the things I see are amazing, and I want to share one story with you that just shouts of God's provision, mercy and grace. Last Tuesday, we joined MMP-the group of pastors who go out to start churches and provide assistance to the poorest slums in Manila. At the end of the day, we stopped at a slum site where a pastor wants to start a church and wants to partner with MMP. Pastor Larry shared his life story with us. At six years old, he ran away from home. His alcoholic father had come home to their tiny shack where he and his six older siblings and his mom were waiting. Being the youngest, he couldn't escape his fathers hands, and his father put him in a bag, hung him from the ceiling and used him for a punching bag. When the bag broke, he ran for his life, vowing to kill his father when he was older. He lived on the streets, hiding during the day and washing jeepney's at night to get money for food as no one would give him money when he begged. He knew he needed to go to school so that he would be able to defend himself in court when he killed his father, so he paid a man to act as his father and get him in school. At seven, someone found him asleep in a jeepney, took him to church and told him that if he believed in Jesus, he would go to heaven. Compared to where he was living, he decided that going to heaven sounded good. He attended church each week, where he was told by the usher to stay hidden under the stairs so no one would see him and not to leave till everyone was gone. But he enjoyed listening to the pastor and once a week he would take the leftover communion bread and juice and go out and "preach" to his street friends, telling them they wouldn't get bread unless they listened. At an early age, he started drinking and doing drugs and smoking. At night, he would stand on a jeepney and cry out to God "send an American to adopt me." But then God spoke to him and said "you don't need an American to adopt you because I adopt you as my son." And so at the age of 12, Larry gave his whole life to Jesus. Later, he found his father and begged for forgiveness. His father embraced him for the first time in his life and also asked for forgiveness. Two years later, Larry led his parents and family to the Lord. At 16, Pastor Larry started his first church. Today, he is married, has seven kids, and takes care of his parents. He has started many churches and trained many pastors. Twice a week he gets up at 4am to go find the street kids in Manila, wake them, give them milk and bread, and give them a touch and tell them Jesus loves them. He has prayed for people and seen the deaf receive their hearing and sick children healed. His faith and joy and the story of God's work in his life left me overwhelmed. It is hard to think of words to say in response to this story. All I know is that all around me, I am met with people who have surrendered their lives to Jesus and would think of nothing else but to give all they have to serve Jesus in areas where the need for him is great.

Where am I?

This is the question I almost had to ask myself last night, as I experienced the Filipino mall. As Jason and I walked around (the girls blessed us with a night out, no kids), it was easy to forget that I wasn’t in the states. The mall (which isn’t the largest mall) was four stories of every kind of store imaginable, air conditioned (I even got to put my sweater to good use), with a food court and all. Of course, the food court was different—tons of stalls all serving a variety of Filipino food, rice included. But if you walk around a bit, you can find Wendy’s, Pizza Hut, KFC, Dunkin Donuts, or Burger King. Some movies are in English, with new releases being shown. Signs are in English, and most of the employees in the stores speak English. The differences? For one thing, we were clearly the minority, and people definitely noticed us. Things seem to be cheaper, especially food (you can get a fast food meal for $1-2). Movies only cost $2 with $0.70 popcorn (yum). If it’s an American brand, however, it’s definitely more. When you walk into the department store, it seems that every rack of clothes has an employee waiting to help you. Oh, and another difference that I’ve noticed in all kinds of establishments (from banks to fast food restaurants), there are armed security guards standing watch at every entrance, sometimes even doing a quick body or purse search. Not bad, just different (this is the phrase we are trying to instill in the kids as they experience life here). Another thing we noticed is that it didn’t seem like many of the people walking around in the mall were there because they were making purchases (we didn’t see a lot of people carrying shopping bags). Which makes sense—it’s a great place to come and get away from the heat, but most people probably can’t afford to shop at the mall. Jason went to a cultural training class the other day, where he learned that there is a small percentage of elite wealthy in the Philippines. These people generally don’t like to associate themselves with the common Filipinos, so they speak mostly English and try to create places that feel more western. The mall definitely felt western. In the end, we enjoyed our time there for the reason that most people probably enjoy their time there—getting a break from the heat and everyday life. But it was one more thing I’ve found to add to the contrast that mixes the rich and the poor.